When I wrote about the art of dying, it broadened my thinking about what I do want, given a choice, when my time comes. Surely the art of dying is the biggest change that any human being experiences, so how do we prepare? Perhaps by removing our cultural angst that this is not a conversation until our advancing years. Perhaps by encouraging others just as young, or even younger than me, to think about this, we can collectively be better prepared and make it easier on our loved ones. And to highlight my point, today, Craig found out that a colleague of his suddenly died on Christmas Eve from a heart attack. He was 52. He leaves behind a wife and 2 children under 10 years old.
None of us know when our time will come and how it will come. By putting together a living will we create a foundation for the medical establishment and our loved ones to go to which will guide them, perhaps at a time when we find we cannot speak for ourselves. So I’ve started to do some research on how to go about this.
In the UK, living wills are more commonly known as advance decisions or advance statements and, as long as you are over 18 and have the mental capacity to make such a statement, your wishes will be considered by your family and medical team. I should point out that, although an advance statement is not legally binding, the medical team should take it into account if they need to make a ‘best interests’ decision on your behalf when you are unable to tell them what you would like. There is a useful fact-sheet on this at
And I know this is not an area which is fashionable to discuss, despite the best efforts of Terry Pratchett, who was open about DEATH AND HIS LOVE OF CURRY.
If you are interested in this topic, a great 6 minutes of your time will be to watch and listen to a Ted Talk by Judy MacDonald Johnson who gives a practical experience of what to do to plan ahead.
So I have some initial thoughts about what I would like covered in my advance statement and they include areas such as;
Diagnosis of a neurological disorder. I will book my trip to Dignitas in Switzerland while I’m still able to take responsibility for myself (if the UK still hangs on to its cultural beliefs that life is to be prolonged at any cost). I have no intention of not being aware of my impact on others, or on myself should this occur.
Brain Trauma. Turn off the life support and move forward. Don’t keep me for a single day as a non-functioning human being – I want no slow torture for me or for those who love me.
Locked in syndrome or an accident where I am unable to control my limbs or body. Don’t artificially feed me or resuscitate me – let me go with dignity. Do not hold onto me hoping for a miracle cure.
Organ donation. Give away whatever of my organs will be of use to another soul. I will have no use for them; hopefully they may help someone else.
When I write my living will, I’ll make sure I discuss it with my GP. When it’s signed I’ll give a copy to my Doctor and my closest loved ones and I’ll make sure I review it every 5 years or so.
I’m not yet 50 and I love life. But I have learned over the past few months than crazy life happenings can occur at any time. I know it’s impossible to plan for every eventuality but there are actions I can take to protect those I love.